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Shareable mantras for every New Year.

Shareable mantras for every New Year.

This past weekend, deconstructing Christmas became absolutely necessary. More pine needles lay under my tree than remained on the branches.... read more →

January 17, 2022

Gender-neutral pronouns show respect. #PronounsDay

Gender-neutral pronouns show respect. #PronounsDay

“Harry, can we talk about pronouns for minute?” I asked my 31-year-old millennial kid recently. “Is this your annual check-in,... read more →

October 20, 2021

The commonalities of leadership and parenting.

The commonalities of leadership and parenting.

I loved getting the chance to talk about the commonalities of leadership and parenting. Many thanks to Out Leadership's Fabrice... read more →

May 7, 2021

Trans allies must also be visible on Transgender Day of Visibility. And every day.

Trans allies must also be visible on Transgender Day of Visibility. And every day.

Transgender Day... read more →

March 31, 2021

On International Pronouns Day, ‘they’ is here to stay!

On International Pronouns Day, ‘they’ is here to stay!

There’s a chance you haven’t yet heard about International Pronouns Day. The observance, which occurs on the third Wednesday in... read more →

October 21, 2020

National Coming Out Day is Sunday. Are you ready to support an LGBTQ+ person who comes out to you?

National Coming Out Day is Sunday. Are you ready to support an LGBTQ+ person who comes out to you?

This Sunday is National Coming Out Day, the LGBTQ+ holiday that celebrates lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, nonbinary and... read more →

October 9, 2020

A sassy Valentine and my love for Mister Rogers.

A sassy Valentine and my love for Mister Rogers.

No glitter, plastic gems or sparkly rhinestones decorated the valentine I gave my kid Harry this year. I’m usually drawn... read more →

February 18, 2020

Transgender awareness in schools.

Transgender awareness in schools.

The maleficent U.S Education Secretary Betsy DeVos kicked off the school year by visiting a private school that bans transgender... read more →

November 19, 2019

When your child comes out to you.

When your child comes out to you.

Let me assure you. The age at which your child comes out about their gender identity and/or sexuality can vary.... read more →

October 11, 2019

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Tweets by MySonWearsHeels

mysonwearsheels

The only words that matter today. ❤️🕊️ #

The only words that matter today. ❤️🕊️

#mlkday2025 #mlk #mlkday

Merrychristmukawanzakah! 💚❤️🖤💙 Whate

Merrychristmukawanzakah! 💚❤️🖤💙

Whatever you’re celebrating today…or not, may there be love, peace, hope and happiness in your heart. 🕊️

I had the great honor last month to speak at Ashla

I had the great honor last month to speak at Ashland’s companywide Transgender Awareness Week event.

Beyond sharing what I learned more than 30 years ago from my 2-year-old child, we talked about shifts in population, the workplace experience of trans folks, and how everyday actions can help people step up their knowledge and allyship.

Through my work as a speaker and educator, I know not everyone is comfortable talking about transgender issues. And I’ve learned it’s often what we don’t know that makes us uncomfortable. We don’t always know the right thing to say and how to be respectful. It takes learning and processing and practice.

From my feedback survey I know the Ashland team learned some things! From sharing pronouns, to not making assumptions, to creating safe spaces for trans people, to realizing that allyship learning is a journey.

My appreciation and gratitude to Ashland’s Ann Wyrick, Margie Best, Martin Fallows and the APAN group for having me and for their commitment to timely educational sessions.🏳️‍⚧️

#respecttranslives

If you know anyone who has red hair, then, statist

If you know anyone who has red hair, then, statistically* speaking, it’s also likely you know someone who’s transgender, whether they’ve shared that with you or not. (And with a nod to awareness, you cannot tell if someone is trans just by looking at them.)

The U.S. election cycle was not kind to transgender people. More than $200 million worth of anti-trans ads ran on television. Ads that demonized an already vulnerable community that does not have as many rights or protections in healthcare, education or employment as most of us. And the incoming administration wants to deny the very existence of transgender folks, people who are our colleagues, friends, family and neighbors. These are serious challenges.

So while I celebrate the strength, resilience and joy of the transgender community, I’m hopeful Trans Awareness Week leads to more shared knowledge. And that knowledge increases understanding and advances action.

Active allyship is critical to protecting the safety, rights and well-being of the transgender people in our lives, and the entire LGBTQ+ community.

*Roughly 2-6% of the U.S. adult population has red hair, while the percentage of transgender people is at least 2%. And among youth 13-17, 1 in 5 identifies as trans, nonbinary or gender nonconforming.

#transawarenessweek #respecttranslives #protecttranslives #transrightsarehumanrights 🏳️‍⚧️

#tbt High school blind date. Happy Halloween! 🧡

#tbt High school blind date. Happy Halloween! 🧡🖤

About to scatter seeds of hope for humankind. ❤️🌏

#monday #weareallhuman

#ff It’s been 9 years since I met performer, act

#ff It’s been 9 years since I met performer, activist, gender discombobulist and noted Queen of Ireland, Dr. Panti Bliss-Cabrera after her show at the Irish Arts Center. And 10 years since she gave her impassioned speech on homophobia at the Abbey Theatre in Dublin. Her masterful address still resonates and is at the top of my LGBTQ+ History Month archive.

Please watch Panti’s speech at #linkinbio. And then think about how you would feel to be given fewer rights than others, or be deemed not worthy of existence.

BTW this is not a selfie. I know better than to cut off a drag queen’s hair!

#lgbtqhistorymonth #lgbtqhistory @pantibliss #dignity #freedom #lgbtqrights #transrightsarehumanrights #yourvoicematters

If you’re straight and cisgender like me, here’s some some food for thought this National Coming Out Day:

One quarter (25.8%) of LGBTQ people in the U.S. remain closeted at work. Half (50.4%) say they are not open about being LGBTQ to their current supervisor.

Those who are out to at least some people were 3 times more likely to have experienced discrimination or harassment than those who are not out to anyone in the workplace, 53.3% compared to 17.9%.

Even in an inclusive work environment, LGBTQ folks still see disclosing their identity as a risk to their relationship with their manager, team members, or customers.

We can do better! No matter what our age or position, we can start by coming out ourselves as active allies to the LGBTQ+ community. Each of us has the ability to listen more carefully, to learn more about the experiences of others and to empathize.

Please commit to tapping into your personal leadership skills and help create a workplace environment where LGBTQ+ colleagues can just be themselves. Amen.

#nationalcomingoutday2024 #nationalcomingoutday 🌈

This 2nd day of LGBTQ+ History Month is the exact

This 2nd day of LGBTQ+ History Month is the exact time to celebrate the historic formation of Advocates for Trans Equality!

I was thrilled to hear last night that “the ink is finally dry” on the merger between the National Center for Transgender Equality and the Transgender Legal Defense & Education Fund, two longtime champions for the trans community. Two years in the making, voilà A4TE!

Consider this one big, bold moment in the fight for U.S. legal rights, political rights and freedoms for transgender people. Follow them, support them, and watch their vision for trans equality unfold on the frontlines of progress. 🏳️‍⚧️

@transequalitynow #A4TE #transrightsarehumanrights

According to Las Vegas Drag Sensation Edie, the Mo

According to Las Vegas Drag Sensation Edie, the Mojave Desert is hot hot hot! But so is she! And her latest show — Edie, Queen of the Desert — is a parade of all her talents, that pays a fittingly fabulous tribute to the 30th anniversary of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

Thanks again, @christuttle, for taking me to see your friend burn up the stage. And for sharing your better-than-mine photos from our super fun night out. (And you were right… I did see Edie as Zumanity’s Mistress of Sensuality in 2011!)

And for everyone in hometown Milwaukee, you get to see Edie’s sizzling hot show next! This Friday, September 27 at LaCage. Don’t miss it! 🔥

And if you’ve never seen Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, you must. And if you have seen it, even more than once, it’s probably 30th-anniversary time to watch again.

@edie_entertainer #EDIEQueenOfTheDesert #PriscillaQueenOfTheDesert #dragqueen #queerartist #queerperformanceart #legendsofdrag

Faeries have moved into the neighborhood! Magic is

Faeries have moved into the neighborhood! Magic is afoot. ✨🧚‍♂️

All the stars were aligned on possibly the luckies

All the stars were aligned on possibly the luckiest Friday the 13th night EVER for “Dusty Childers: Live in 4D” at Joe’s Pub. The non-stop showcase of talent, fun, laughs, love and exuberance included @christeene_official @charleneincarnate @msambermartin @arishapiro @macyrodman @dextertheangel @mxviv and @daneterryig. And the Birthday Babe changed outfits more often than Cher, with couture extravaganza by @machinedazzle @sturdivantcostumes @austinscarlettofficial and more. The band and the Desperados on vocals slayed, too.

To capture the night was impossible. To relive it, easily done. Hope you’re 4ever in that moment, Dusty. SO many people love you! HBD. 🧁🎈🦄🦋🌟👑😘😘😘😘

The devil was slayed Tuesday night. And not just o

The devil was slayed Tuesday night. And not just on the debate stage.

It was also opening night of Justin Vivian Bond’s “There’s a Devil on the Loose” at Joe’s Pub.

This original sinner is envious of everyone who’s at tonight’s last sold-out show. The performance, the setlist, the band will be on fire.

@mxviv #glamourisresistance

How do you explain book bans to kids? What can ele

How do you explain book bans to kids? What can elementary school librarians and teachers who aren’t allowed to talk about censorship say to a child whose favorite picture book goes missing from the school library?

I’ll tell you it’s nearly impossible to explain book banning to children without using the words “some people.” As in “some people are unhappy with the books we have in our library and our classrooms.” Or, “some people don’t like the book because the penguins are both dads.”

Thanks to Jacob, the gender-expansive headliner of one of the most banned books of the decade, and star of the newly released Jacob’s Missing Book, we see how adults are often forced to fumble with explanations. And at the same time, we also see how imaginative kids confused by censorship of beloved titles can tell their own stories about diverse families and parental love.

Published on the same day school started in Brooklyn, I’m donating my copy of Jacob’s Missing Book to the library at neighborhood P.S. 9. Maybe you’ll be moved to do the same for a local school or family home library.

Let there be no confusion that reading has the power to broaden perspective, expand learning and help develop empathy.

Many thanks to Sarah & Ian Hoffman for another stellar story. 🌟📚🌈

@sarahandianhoffman @chriscasedraws @maginationpress #weneeddiversebooks #readbannedbooks #bannedbooks #lgbtqkidlit #inclusivebooks #weneeddiversebooks #readtherainbow

My bubbles were always Bazooka. 🩷 📸: Tom Ba

My bubbles were always Bazooka. 🩷

📸: Tom Bamberger, 1998

Maybe you’ll be as wow-ed as I was by this new p

Maybe you’ll be as wow-ed as I was by this new portrait of queer icon Agosto Machado, the latest addition to the Legends of Drag archive and published on wussymag.com. And the interview article by co-creators Harry James Hanson and Devin Antheus moved me to misty-eyed reverence and admiration for this Downtown NYC legend.

I met Agosto when she was honored guest at the @nycaidsmemorial’s Legends of Drag Revue honoring Pride Month and HIV/AIDS Long-Term Survivors Awareness Day. I felt humbled in her presence…as if I were meeting an ancient deity spirit. And that was before I’d seen the installation she and Devin Antheus had created in the reflecting fountain at NYC AIDS Memorial Park.

Her 1960s desire was to “liberate everyone.” And she had no qualms about asserting her difference to that end. And what joy to learn that the Downtown queens always felt safe around the Hell’s Angels!

Check out my #linkinbio to be immersed in Agosto the artist, the mystic, the Warhol star, and the truest of friends.

📸 @skirtsuit
🌸 @antheus_

@legendsofdrag @wussy #agostomachado #legendsofdrag #draglegend #dragicon #dragroyalty #draghistory #queerhistory #lgbtqhistory 👑

Here’s some very good news that didn’t get muc

Here’s some very good news that didn’t get much attention over the weekend. (Duh.)

“Gender identity is real. The record makes this clear.”
~Federal District Court Judge Robert Hinkle

That’s what Hinkle wrote in his decision Thursday, upholding a permanent ruling in Florida last month that BLOCKED RESTRICTING ACCESS to gender-affirming care for trans adults and completely banned care for transgender minors.

Here’s what else he wrote:

“Some legislators plainly acted from old-fashioned discriminatory animus,” as he cited examples of lawmakers who called trans people “mutants” said that trans identity “is just ideological or made up or wokeism,” and said that the bill “saves trans people” and “recognizes who they are in the eyes of God.”

And there’s more!

“In time, discrimination against transgender individuals will diminish, just as racism and misogyny have diminished. To paraphrase a civil-rights advocate from an earlier time, the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice. In the meantime, the federal courts have a role to play in upholding the Constitution and laws.”

While I applaud Judge Hinkle’s moral, ethical, and constitutional ruling, I’m also celebrating with the trans folks in Florida, and their families. May we all be able to make the healthcare decision that are right for us.

#transgenderrightsarehumanrights #transhealth #ProtectTransKids #lgbtqia

A beautiful repost to close out International Nonb

A beautiful repost to close out International Nonbinary People’s Day! Shoutout and thanks to @transpainter for reminding us that kids are smarter than most adults when it comes to understanding gender. 💛🤍💜🖤

“We were talking with the kids about being nonbinary and kept coming back to this: there are many acceptable ways to be nonbinary.

“Here are the examples from our kids tonight:

“Some non-binary people have cats and some have dogs and some have no pets at all.

“Some nonbinary folks have long hair, some have short hair, some have pink, and some have no hair at all.

“Non-binary people can be tall or short, young or old, dads or moms or zookeepers or teachers.

“Some non-binary people really like pizza and some are vegan.

“Some non-binary people wear pajamas all day long and some of them are librarians.

“Some non-binary people live on farms and some of them drive boats.

“All non-binary people are non-binary if they say they are.

“You don’t get to tell other people what their gender is. Everyone gets to decide for themselves.

“None of this is too complex for our seven and four-year-old. It really shouldn’t be for anyone else.”

🎨 @transpainter

#nonbinary #nonbinarypeoplesday #nonbinaryisbeautiful

After a momentous, monthlong June celebration of Q

After a momentous, monthlong June celebration of Queer Joy, July usually feels like a letdown. And this year is no exception. But I feel GREAT knowing there are LGBTQ+ Pride events happening around the world every month of the year except December! That means A LOT of visibility as thousands of people take to the streets year-round to celebrate the truth and beauty of queerness and honor the transcestors and gay liberationists who took a stand in 1969 (and before) against police brutality and violence. So this month I’m with you San Diego, Bristol, UK and Cologne, Germany!!

Here at home, I get to relive the energy that comes with celebrating the expansiveness of LGBTQ+ folks by sharing some of my favorite Pride March 2024 marcher photos. 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🌈

#queerjoy #nycpride #nycpridemarch #nycpridemarch2024 #pridemarch #lgbtqrights #lgbtqrightsarehumanrights #beyourself

Finding Monday pm motivation where it’s availabl

Finding Monday pm motivation where it’s available any day of the week — reliving the Pride Baby Tea Brunch scenario! 💃🌪️💃🏻
Also sending mega congrats to the super fine Superfine for their 2nd NGLCCNY grant!! 🎉 And cheers to the super fab last weekend of Pride Month brunch bunch. 🌈

#BabyTeaBrunch @tylerjashley @charleneincarnate @superfinedumbo @nglccny

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